The History Of Online Poker

Feb. 24, 2010   Leave a Comment  

How did online poker get started? While some of those who are newer to poker may feel as if online poker has always existed, the reality is that online poker is a relatively new phenomenon. The Internet has only been available for commercial use for a couple of decades, and the technology for conventional online poker only available for a single decade. Nevertheless, the online game has completely permeated the poker world.

Online Poker: The Beginning

Without the Internet, of course, there could be no online poker. In the early days of the Internet, real time communication was a challenge. The Internet was mostly used to transmit large packets of information from one computer to another. Jarkko Oikarinen, an Internet visionary, saw a different use. He created IRC, or Internet Relay Chat, in 1988. IRC was the first instant messaging system. As soon as two people could communicate effectively online, poker players saw the applications for their favorite game, and IRC poker began. There were no graphics and no real money was exchanged, but IRC poker was the predecessor of something big.

Online Poker: The Sites

In 1998, the company Planet Poker introduced the first truly effective online poker software, complete with graphics and the ability for people to play real poker against each other in real time. Planet Poker took a risk, but one that paid off. Online poker took off fast, although at the time traffic was limited to an elite group of people who enjoyed gambling or cards and who were Internet savvy. Still, it was enough to keep Planet Poker going, and to inspire new poker sites like Paradise Poker and Pacific Poker.

Online Poker: The Current Era

Companies like PartyPoker, PokerStars and Full Tilt Poker took online poker to a new level. PartyPoker did it through a heavy advertising campaign using their spokesman Mike Sexton and the World Poker Tour, also offering a chance to win a seat on a poker tournament cruise, the PartyPoker Million. Full Tilt Poker did it by hiring as many name pros to play on their site as they could get. PokerStars did it by offering more tournaments and more satellites than ever before. When one of those satellite winners, Chris Moneymaker, won the World Series of Poker main event, online poker reached heights no one could have anticipated, and though its growth was slowed a bit by American anti-online gaming legislation in 2006, it is still a huge industry today.

The Ten Most Annoying Things In Sports

Jan. 14, 2009   28 Comments  

With Monday’s  announcement of the Baseball Hall of Fame Class of 2009, it has prompted me to look at some of the more annoying things in sports.

10.  Baseball Writers’ Association of America (BBWA)

The BBWA has the proud distinction of selecting who makes the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, arguably the most exclusive of all of the hall of fame’s in America.  Unfortunately, the BBWA is filled with clowns who follow some ass backwards rules- namely that some of them refuse to vote for guys on the ballot the first time.  The requirements for the hall states that 75% of voters must vote for a player….in the history of Major League Baseball no man has ever received 100% of the votes (Tom Seaver came the closest with 98.84%).  Babe Ruth even missed out on 11 votes!

9.  The NHL in Warm Weather Climates

The NHL use to be great.  Use to be.  Until it decided to expand to places where hockey was a foreign word.  Until the NHL gets rid of Atlanta, Columbus (not warm weather, but seriously Columbus?), Tampa Bay, Florida, Phoenix,  and two of the California teams, I will not care.  There should be a rule that says if you can’t get a ski rental and go skiing in your town (or nearby), you should not have a hockey team. Unless it brings back the Whalers or the Nordiques, the two teams with the best unis in the sport.

Phoenix Coyotes my ass....

Classy...

8.  College Bowl Games

What do the San Diego County Credit Union, Papajohns.com, Roady’s,  and Gaylord Hotels all have in common?  They all sponsored bowl games, of which there are now 34 of, meaning 68 teams get to play in the college postseason (56.6% of teams in FBS).  Meanwhile,  97 teams out of 347 (27%) go to the basketball postseason in some form in college basketball (NIT included).  Bowl games used to mean something….now they mean a potential trip to Boise or Shreveport.

We're going to Idaho!

We're going to Idaho!

7. The Heavyweight Champion(s)

It would be great to see boxing make a return to the limelight.  Especially the heavyweight division.  But with currently 4 different men being recognized as the heavyweight champ by 5 different organizations, this isn’t going to happen anytime soon.

In the meantime, four men on the Medifast diet and exercise regimens can continue training.

6. Erin Andrews Lack of Naked Pictures

How this has not happened yet is beyond me.  If this ever does come to happen, I’m convinced the Internet will blow up.

Something special

Something special

Erin Andrews is definitely a woman who has never needed a liquid diet or Medifast coupon in her life.

5. Bill Raftery does not Call the Final Four

Good news: Bill Packer is out.  Bad news: the most entertaining man in college basketball probably still won’t get the chance to call the Final Four and yell “Onions!” every time Mario Chalmers hits a 3 in the final seconds…

Side note: Imagine Gus Johnson alongside Bill calling anything…the could make the World Scrabble Championships must viewing…some one take this idea to ESPN before they give Jim Rome more air time….

4. Sportswriters

I thank the Internet and ESPN for killing the world of sportswriting.  Granted there are some very good ones still out there- Mike Wilbon and Rick Reilly- but there are also the likes of Jim Rome, every member of Around the Horn, Scoop Jackson and whoever else ESPN deems to be loud, obnoxious, idiotic and perfect to put on television.  Most of these guys are nothing more than wannabe jocks who are still pissed about being cut from the basketball team in tenth grade.  But unlike MJ, it didn’t drive them to be better athletes, rather it just made them want to sit on the sidelines and thrown stones.  Grantland Rice must roll in his grave everytime Jay Mariotti talks…

3.  No Sports Team in Las Vegas

Las Vegas is one of the greatest places on Earth.  It is adult Disneyland.  When guys win the Super Bowl they should say “I’m going to the Spearmint Rhino!” instead of the damn Disneyland line.  Can you imagine a sports team in Vegas…mainly an NBA team.  They would easily go 38-3 at home every year, cause every other team would be so hungover/still drunk from the previous night.  Even better idea: make the Vegas team all rookies for it’s expansion year.  They would win maybe 5 games all year, but the TV show that would follow the team could make for great entertianment.  Get me ESPN on the phone cause I smell an Emmy for Best Reality TV Show…

Where real celebrations take place...

Where real celebrations take place...

2. 8 PM games that start closer to 8:30

If you live on the West Coast this is probably not that big of a problem, but where the majority of the country lives, this is something that is getting out of hand.  Monday Night Football starts close to 9:20 PM now and does not end until midnight.  The World Series, NBA Finals and Stanley Cup are all decided between 11 and 12 at night.  The biggest college football game of the week is the Saturday Night game…if I’ve been drinking all day at my normal pace I’m passed out by the second quarter.  Maybe it is just getting older, but these late games suck.


1. Joe Buck

Randy Moss’ “disgusting  act.”  His smugness.  His glasses.  The fact that he called games for the Cardinals.  He got his B.A. in English (alright I’m reaching for reasons to not like the guy, but honestly, nobody likes him so who cares).  The fact that some of the biggest games in my lifetime I’ve had to suffer through him calling them (D-Backs/Yankees Series; McGwire’s 62nd HR; the Red Sox winning the World Series) .  And his calling of this year’s World Series, where my hometown Phillies ended Billy Penn’s Curse, and all the jackass could talk about the whole series was the amazing season of the Rays and for some reason the Red Sox, who were home watching the series.  I admit, I just don’t like the jerkface, hence he takes this spot.

Grade A Weenie...

Grade A Weenie...

Here is a response to one e-mail we received in response to this post:

Dear Will,

First off I would like to thank you for the opinion and the grammar tips because they will be extremely helpful in the future. As you can see throughout your journey through the serenity of This is God Given, we make very little attempt to do legitimate sportswriting. I am basically just looking for you to smirk or chuckle to yourself as I use some terribly unwitty metaphor in describing a certain development in the sports world. I am ecstatic that you see me as annoying and encourages me to continue with my unholy antics. In summation, is that correct structure? Anyway, go read some Anne Coulter and deep throat yourself, hardass.

Sincerely,

This is God Given

On Thu, Jan 15, 2009 at 2:22 PM, Will Owen <exsquidwo@yahoo.com> wrote:

4. Sportswriters

I thank the Internet and ESPN for killing the world of sportswriting.  Granted there are some very good ones still out there- Mike Wilbon and Rick Reilly- but there are also the likes of Jim Rome, every member of Around the Horn, Scoop Jackson and whoever else ESPN deems to be loud, obnoxious, idiotic and perfect to put on television.  Most of these guys are nothing more than wannabe jocks who are still pissed about being cut from the basketball team in tenth grade.  But unlike MJ, it didn’t drive them to be better athletes, rather it just made them want to sit on the sidelines and thrown stones.  Grantland Rice must roll in his grave everytime Jay Mariotti talks…
I know it must be lost on you, but think about what is annoying in the world of sports you……….YOU!  (Who gives a rat’s ass what you find annoying anyway?)
Also, do a better job of editing.  Joe Buck does not call games for the “Cadinals”  and you spell Bill Rafferty with two “L”s.

Sunday Dumb Day 12/14

Dec. 14, 2008   1 Comment  

As you revel in a day of laying on the couch and probably some jacking off to Lacey Underall in Caddyshack on ESPN2, here is this week’s wrap-up.

Fanhouse – Tiger Woods’ Caddie Tells Stories Of Phil Mickelson’s Man Boobs

Cuzgoogle – Now Playing: Forgetting Sam Mitchell

PSAMP – Rick Tocchet Is, And Never Was, Smart

Moondog – Why I Hate Marko Jaric

Tailgating Ideas – Layla Kiffin Looks Like A Porn Star

Hugging Harold Reynolds – Q-Tip to Leitch: Yo, What The Scenario

Awful Announcing – Wilbon: “Threesomes Keep It Interesting”

FanDome – Barry Sanders Has A Son…

Busted Coverage – Cuff ‘Em: Top 20 Sports Related Arrests of 2008

My Future Child

Nov. 15, 2008   1 Comment  

Although it may be a few years away, because I am not an All-American, I have mapped out a plan in grooming and training an athlete that will make Spike from Little Giants look like his favorite show is Beauty and the Geek. Oh wait, he was on that show so it’s probably a bad example, also check this video out cause they definitely went wrong somewhere. Alright so that tangent was just getting back to the fact that my future son will be an athletic specimen. Here is how I lay out his future:

Years – Pre-conception through Birth

- Find tall strong women in the mold of a Hope Solo.

- Make wife lift during pregnancy so baby is already gaining muscle.

- Have entire crowd in delivery room cheering. The earlier he gains confidence, the better.

Years – Infant through Toddler

- Alternate days tying each hand behind his back so that he becomes ambidextrous.

- Only allow him to drink milk in order to practice for his future endorsement.

- Create entire nursery made of “Heart of the Hide” leather including pigskin blankets.

- Recreate this scene so that he develops comfortability with fame that is sure to follow him.

Years – Elementary School

- Begin Bo Jackson training regimen of nightly push-ups and sit-ups.

- Commence diet of all protein, with emphasis on beef jerky

- Coach little leagues and midget football teams to develop star quality.

- Make him memorize Dougie’s Goin’ Deep articles to get the innocence out of him.

Years – Middle School

- Begin daily “Ichiro” like training schedule with a focus on the big 3 sports.

- Choose best AAU programs in basketball and baseball, but allow to still play in town for football to gain some local recognition as well as news articles.

- Don’t allow to reach peak with females just yet, has too much prove in coming years.

Years – High School

- Start training with supplements, while making sure to continue speed training. You know like Ryan Harris from Notre Dame when he was on True Life.

- Make start working labor jobs during the Summer to realize he needs to work hard to get the attention.

- Allow to start slaying girls so that he gets it out of his system before the real work starts.

- Only grant interviews to national media to increase hype.

Years – College

- Only accept draft deal if picked in first 10 picks of MLB Draft.

- Find program that will allow two to three sport participation.

- Warn him of the trials and tribulations of Travis Henry.

- Finish degree following junior year and enter MLB, NBA, and NFL drafts.

Years – Professional

- Find him a hot wife.

- Hire Scott Boras or Drew Rosenhaus.

- Pick out the house that I want and find second wife.

What You Need To Do

- Prepare yourself for The Third Coming.

Was That Wade Phillips Going After Egon?

Oct. 1, 2008   Leave a Comment  

I heard from The Messiah the other day that Cowherd was calling Wade Phillips the marshmallow man, so I went with it, because there is never enough Ghostbusters talk. Also, I recently heard some rumors about a third movie being made.

On another note, David Ortiz could be Slimer.

The Rank: Vendors

Sept. 24, 2008   Leave a Comment  

The Best

1. Peanut Guy – Peanuts have been a staple of sporting events for a long time and the person holding this iconic position stands above all others. This vendor stands alone because not only is his product well-respected, but very rarely can one (not named Kyle Farnsworth) be paid to throw objects at another human being.

2. Beer Guy – The long-time flag bearer of the vendor ranks has come under fire recently with the rising price of the product as well as the constant IDing of legal age consumers has become a major setback. Not to mention the resistance to providing caps to beer bottles, however the product adds a new element to game and will continue to be a staple for the rowdiest of fans. This goes without saying, but the “Beer Man” is also the most distinguish. Their brethren include the Phillies Miller Lite guy who is a sight to behold, notice the little girl that runs away at the end.

3. Cracker Jack Guy – Some could call the Cracker Jack Guy to be the pinnacle of vending due to the shear history of the product, but it has definitely seen better days as it can really only be seen during baseball games. It may be a product of the past, but there is still a strong contingent that relies on being rewarded with a prize at the bottom of the box.

The Worst

1. Cotton Candy Guy – In a battle of Royal Rumble of ballpark foods, cotton candy would fair the same as Martin Gramatica in a Royal Rumble of NFL kickers. Beer and Peanuts would beat the pink novelty worse than George Lucas’ daughter. This fact going along with the constant hassling over the obstructed view that it creates, makes this vendor job the worst of all. Respect is lost and nothing is gained, the only question I have is if the vending industry works the same way as the porn industry. Do vendors have to start out with cotton candy just like guys in porn have to start out with some gay action?

The Second Coming's Birthday

Sept. 12, 2008   1 Comment  

Happy Birthday, you old bastard. . .

I’d like to introduce myself to all of the disciples, I’m the MESSIAH, and i’ll be your holy ghost from here on out . . .

So I’m livin here in Cleveland while I’m going to law school, and the crap I read and see about Ohio State and the Cleveland Browns makes me absolutely sick. There was an article in the Plain-Dealer yesterday, suggesting that Tressel intentionally had his team play terribly last week to “set up” USC.  I didn’t mind Ohio State before, but now I hope they lose by 40.  To make matters worse, the article cited Terry Bowden, that’s right, Terry Bowden, as the expert on these matters.  There’s a reason that grits-eating Bayou rat has been out of coaching for the last decade, and that’s because he is dumber than Vince Young taking the WonderLIc.  I gotta go now, but i’ll be back in a little bit to address the Browns.

Peace Be with you

And also with you

You Know How I Knew John Amaechi Was Gay?

Aug. 18, 2008   Leave a Comment  

Upon hearing the recent news of John Amaechi coming upon some tensions at the Olympics, no pun intended, I decided to bring back an old radio clip from when the news of his sexuality broke. The guys at Right in my Mouth Radio seemed to have a pretty good idea that Amaechi was a little femme. Make sure to check out the one liner 2 minutes and 10 seconds in, it is devastating.

[audio:http://thisisgodgiven.com/files/2008/08/john-amaechi.mp3]

It's Not Even Going To Be Fair, Like Those Speedo Swimsuits

Aug. 5, 2008   Leave a Comment  

The Revolution has begun.

[audio:http://thisisgodgiven.com/files/2008/08/this-is-god-given-info.mp3]